#i wish you could've seen the place i got and the car i rented

[floorgazing]

it's been a shitty fucking couple of weeks and axel has fuck all to say for himself.

not just shitty, abysmal — a real rock bottom if he's ever fucking had one, and the weight of it has him sitting at this table with his head down, stare distant and expression solemn as gio cooks. he's fixed on the wall, going over it all in his head; how he got from point a to point z. it started with getting dumped by a girl he was way more into than she was into him, escalated to getting fired for missing one too many days of work, then getting evicted for missing one too many rent payments, then surfing couches for as long as he could before his handful of friends just couldn't host him anymore, then sleeping in his car in the cold of winter, and then finally getting so desperate that he called and begged his mom for somewhere to stay. the thing is, she said yes. she let him come home after ten years apart, after a decade of estrangement and minimal contact, and the fuck of it all is that it only took three days for him to leave a mess, never having felt worse about himself.

he's stoned, which, of course he is. he's hurt. again — of course he is. it's worse on the inside than it is the on the outside but he got into it with her boyfriend, because of course he did, so there's marks to show for it. he could've gone to rory, he knows, but he's always had this thing about being the big brother when it came to her; leeching off her was a no-go of epic proportion, no matter how tough shit got. he definitely could've come to gio sooner and he knows that, but he's so resistant to help. his point of pride is probably going to be what kills him. he almost didn't even knock on gio's door tonight — he'd actually just parked in front of his place with the intention of sleeping out in his car so he didn't bother him, despite knowing good and well about that guest room and how much gio wouldn't mind him crashing it. his heart pangs when gio calls it his room, chin dipping down to stare at the plate put before him.

at first, he doesn't say anything ( even when the little shit in him wants to call out the shame gio just brought to his brooklyn accent ); he just eats what's put in front of him without complaint, and of course, it's the best thing he's had to eat all week. this isn't his normal quiet, isn't his normal shut-you-out attitude. once he's a good few bites in, he swallows and sits long enough to formulate a thought. "s'good, g. s'always really good. thank you." can't have the chef feeling insulted, huh? "everything happened." he kind of laughs after he says it, shakes his head between bites. "i got fired a few weeks ago." he's also seen gio several times since then, never mentioned it. "dumped. evicted. i went to my mom's." he does a vague gesture to the black eye.

again, he knows about the guest room — he isn't surprised gio's calling it his before he can even get the chance to grovel and ask him to stay, but the thought of showing up this pitiful in front of a guy he admired so much was so suffocating a thought. until now, he's been too stubborn to take him up on crashing with him for longer than a night here and there — but now he wishes he'd come crawling before things got this bad. axel looks up to gio in more ways than one, feels more comfortable with him than anyone he's ever met; the fact that he's admitting anything to him is basically unheard of to anyone else. "a shower sounds... really fuckin' nice. so do clean sheets. i just don't wanna put you out, man." the last half of that sentence is earnestly reluctant, his voice raw. "...pretty much all my shit's in the car."

closed for: @floorgazing with: giovanni rossi plot: oh shit, is that dad vibes?

gio is ill equiped to be a comforting presence. he's brash and sarcastic, he's a little bit too blunt most of the time, he's been compared to gordon ramsey more often than he's been praised for his humanitarianism, but there's a soft spot in his heart for people, a reason why he cooks is to feed people, because fed people are happy, and deep down, making people happy matters. it doesn't mean he's weak, or that he lets employees get over on him, and he's certainly been called a dick both to his face and behind his back.

but gio cares about people.

it's why when the knock on his door at 2 am wakes him up, he doesn't ignore it. it's why, when axel is the one standing there on the other side of the door, he's immediately ushering him inside, dragging him to the kitchen and sitting him down at the table. it's why his frying pan is out and on the stove immediately and he's cracking eggs into it without even stopping to ask questions. it's why he has a breakfast plate nearly done before he turns to look at the kid with an expression of mixed frustration and worry.

"wanna tell me what happened, or are we doing the 'm'fine, gio, just had a rough night' schtick?" his approximate impression of axel is terrible at best, but it gets his point across, and he sets the plate down before sitting across the table, his fingers steepling in front of him. "you're lucky i just changed the sheets in your room this morning, you know. get to sleep on clean bedding." his room, not the guest room, because gio's already come to think of that space as axel's space. already considered the different ways he can offer axel the room without it feeling strange or uncomfortable for the kid. he's an entire adult man, he doesn't need gio babying him.

that doesn't stop gio from wanting to, at least a little bit.

"eat. you look like you need to eat. i'm not gonna bother asking if i should take you to a doctor, since i know you'll say no, but i can feed you and toss you in the shower and get you to bed, so..." a hand waves flippantly toward the plate, and he leans back in that seat finally. "plus, if you don't eat, i'll assume you hate my food, and as a chef, i don't think there's any higher insult than that."

[hyunverse]

how to hide a body | fushiguro megumi

✧ gender neutral.

✧ tags: angst, thriller.

✧ warnings: dead body, death, murder, mention of cheating, vomit.

✧ summary: everything in your life changes the moment megumi asks you how to hide a dead body.

fuck, fuck, fuck. those were the only words you repeated— no, you could comprehend in your head. everything happening felt so surreal that your head was empty. or maybe it was so full, you couldn't focus on just one thought.

the lake was calm, a contrast to your racing heartbeat. if the lake wasn't so hidden then maybe people would come here to fish. you're certain nobody comes here though, you did your research.

much to your dismay, the blanket covering the body slipped, showing the corpse's face. you looked down at the dead woman and winced. her eyes were wide open— no, popped out like fucking buttons, lips a light blue and her veiny neck was bruised. the bruises were all black and blue. she looked so fragile in your arms, her shoulder blades seemed sharper than usual. it must've hurt like hell, you thought. to be choked to death like that. you hissed when the image of getting choked and gasping for breath appeared in your head. not now. not when you're discarding the body. you decided to think about this mess later on.

carefully, you closed the woman's eyes with your gloved fingers. discarding her body would be impossible if she was staring right at you as if she's still alive, judging your every move. quickly after, you covered her face back with the blanket.

megumi on the other hand sat on a rock, eyes glued on the ground. just looking at your figure holding the dead body made his body run with chills. it's like that feeling when you know you're about to get tickled— the throbbing and the itch on your body. scared that the person will touch you. that's how he felt, chills ran all over his body, goosebumps on his skin.

fushiguro megumi has seen many dead bodies, but none he killed. he gulped. he killed her. he killed the woman in your hands— his girlfriend. was his girlfriend.

"i didn't mean to, i didn't mean to", he repeated in his head. as if repeating the same words would make it real.

truths are the things you make. truths aren't things that actually happened, it's something you make believe. however, it's not guaranteed your heart will believe in it. minds are easily deceived, but your heart isn't. right now megumi wishes he could just rip his heart out his chest. then take some stupid pills to quiet down his brain or something. anything to destroy this feeling in him.

you looked back at megumi to see his hands in his hair, ripping the pretty black strands you've always loved. his body heaved as he breathed.

a few days prior megumi had stormed into your dorm, where you were happily watching a show. he was panting, and he was sweaty.

"how do you hide a body?", he asked. you laughed, because you thought he was joking. the amount of times you binge-watched criminal minds with him must've gotten into his head.

but he was short of breath. you looked at his hands and saw the way his hands were trembling, and you instantly knew he did something wrong. incredibly wrong.

"she cheated on me y/n, she cheated on me", megumi kept on repeating when he brought you to see the body.

his girlfriend was laying on the floor of his dorm with her eyes wide opened, lips slightly parted. she looked like she had regrets. which she most probably did, what sorcerer doesn't die with regrets? most of them do, that's what the principal had said before. megumi's blood was under her finger nails, you could tell she tried to free herself.

when you think about it again, you realized that you could've just ran. run out of his room, back to yours and drool over fucking levi ackerman or something. or you could've reported to the police. anything that would get you of this situation.

love makes you do stupid, irrational things. you were in love. crazy lovesick. he was your darling, your angel— whatever you call somebody you adore. so you covered the body with a random blanket you bought in kyoto. you loaded the body into the boot of a rented car, with megumi crying in the passenger's seat. you drove miles away, ignoring the rotting smell of a corpse.

all for fushiguro megumi. how foolish is that?

"do you want to say goodbye?", you asked, immediately regretting your decision. megumi shook his head, not even daring to look your way. he fiddled with his fingers instead, his tears nearly slipping from his blue eyes.

okay then, you thought. you walked towards the edge of the water, and you swore you could feel the earth swallowing you down. perhaps it was your punishment, for covering up this murder. she was a cheater but she didn't deserve death. you knew that. it took all of your energy to walk even more, the earth swallowing you down inch by inch.

finally, you kneeled. you placed the body down, watching the water pull the body down, consuming her away. away from your sight. hopefully never to be seen again. you tossed her phone into the water, eyeing the electronic as it submerges into the water.

you took a deep breath, shutting your eyes close as you did so. you turned towards a weeping megumi, dusting dirt off your jeans.

"it's done, 'gumi", you muttered, "she's gone".

he simply nodded and got up from his spot, summoning one of his divine dogs. the two of you walked back to your rented car, the dog trailing behind to cover up your footsteps. in case anyone visits the place.

complete silence. the car was completely silent, quieter than a library. the scent of a corpse was still present in the car, so you hung up your air refreshener.

and then you drove. away from the madness. for good. in hopes that the further away you get from the lake, the more innocent you'll feel.

megumi sat cross legged on his seat, looking around in the car. his gaze fell on your hands resting on the gear stick. pristine and clean— if he hadn't known better he would've thought you just got a manicure.

his body moved before his brain did. softly, he put his hand on top of yours, caressing your soft skin. something in him fluttered. you didn't move your hand away so he left his hand there. gentle fingers circling your complexion.

as he cradled your hand he thought about your friendship. why didn't he like you instead? he squeezed your hand as he pondered. wouldn't it have been easier? things wouldn't end up the way it did if he chose you in the first place. you were always so nice to him. he tapped his pointer against your hand to the rythm of the song playing on the radio. megumi imagined your blood streaming throughout your body— something his girlfriend would never be able to do anymore.

curse his mind. he felt sick. there was heat bubbling up his stomach, up to his throat. a vile taste on his tongue. rushing, he grabbed a brown paper bag and threw up. vomit pouring out of his mouth the way you poured bleach on his bedroom floor.

hearing him throw up, you looked at him through your rear mirror. megumi's eyes met yours through the mirror too, only for a brief second before he felt the need to vomit again. you looked away as well.

figuring out how megumi felt wouldn't require a mind reader. you understood his gaze immediately. things will never be the same, not after the two of you saw what you were capable of. secrets would be kept but the friendship wouldn't.

all of that shit wasn't worth it, you monologued. what did you expect anyway? for him to pull you into his lap, kiss you senseless and tell you he loves you? that he had been in love with you since forever? for him to tell you that he's proud of you?

no matter how much you do for somebody, they wouldn't change their feelings for you unless if they want to.

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[allexday]

jennie; perhaps you had reason to not notice in the beginning, when your bank account had five hundred extra dollars in it. it could've been a mistake, you thought. though when you filed to get it checked out, they insisted that the money deposit was on purpose. you were stunned, but you brushed it off.

there was no reason to not take advantage of the situation, so you treated yourself to your favorite food and bought some of those clothes you'd been wanting for a while.

however, you started suspecting things when the school called to tell you your entire tuition had been paid for. and then not even two days later, you got the call telling you your rent had been paid for the entire year, as well as your car fees.

although everything seemed too good to be true, you weren't necessarily upset about the recent changes.

not until you realized just who was sending ten thousand dollars every week to your bank account.

you admit it had been hard to track down. but she was the only one who could possibly be responsible for everything. you weren't mad, hell, you weren't even going to confront her. however, when you found out your apartment building had been bought by her, as well as your place of work... that was the last straw.

"ah, y/n, I didn't think you'd be here at this time of night," jennie opened her door, letting you inside of her massive penthouse. you were used to the marble floors and ceiling-to-floor windows, but seeing jennie in her silk robe was another thing entirely.

"ah, jennie," you mumbled, glancing away while pointing at her figure. she smirked, quirking a brow. "what is it, have you never seen a female's body before? come on now, we're best friends. no need to be shy,"

as she walked to set her glass of wine down on her stainless counter, you took a deep breath in. now was the time.

"jennie, I know it's you,"

you noticed how she chuckled at your words, winking at you.

"oh? haha, guilty. I knew you'd figure out I got us to be the next two new vogue models but I didn't figure it'd be this soon-"

"what? no! jennie, I know you're the one paying for everything! you're the only one I know who has that much money, and I want you to know that this isn't cool. you should've asked me first before doing any of it!"

your voice was slightly raised as you explained yourself, not noticing how she was beginning to frown.

"plus, you know I would've said no! I mean, giving me extra money to help me out when I need it is not the same thing as paying off my debt! or hell, buying the apartment building I live in!" you breathed, catching your breath. "it's like you're obsessed with me all of a sudden. you shouldn't be in this many parts of my life,"

you noticed she was clenching her teeth, and she no longer looked happy.

"you sound really ungrateful, you know,"

"wha-what?" you stuttered, surprised by her angry tone.

"it's not like that y/n! I'm your friend and wanted to do something for you, it has nothing to do with my feelings for you! stop acting like I'm in love with you!"

you were stunned by her words. she was glaring at you, absolutely furious, as she continued going off about how it was crazy to think she even liked you.

"do not even get me started on how poor you are! the fact that someone as powerful as me is even associating myself with you is what's really crazy y/n!" her words hit you, making tears well up in your eyes. however, she was so blinded by rage that she didn't see.

"you're a nobody, you know that? no one even knew your name before I started talking to you. and even then, they only fucking talk to you because you're my best friend!"

tears rolled down your cheeks as you soaked in her words. despite how rude and cruel they were, you knew, deep down, they were true. you've always known that you indeed would not be as successful if you were not friends with jennie. despite that, you took pride in everything you accomplished. you still worked just as hard, perhaps even harder than others, to get where you are now.

she suddenly stopped, her eyes wide as she looked at you. you were trembling, shoulders shaking, and face red. you were embarrassed and hurt. she was supposed to be a friend, and all she ended up doing was insulting you.

"y/n-"

"I think I should go. since you don't need me,"

you turned to leave, walking a few steps before jennie began rushing to you. she grabbed your arm, her grip tight and desperate.

"wait, where are you going, no,"

you shook her off easily, pushing her off of you. "there you go again, always demanding things. don't touch me," you didn't spare her a glance as you walked to the door.

she was breathing heavily, feeling as if the walls were closing in on her. her heart was racing as tears began slipping down her cheeks. what had she done? she didn't mean any of it. none of it.

"no, y/n, please," you ignored her, reaching for the doorknob.

"I love you, you fucking idiot!"

you stopped in your tracks, eyes wide. what... what did she just say?

she was sobbing, looking desperately at your back.

"I've even in love with you for so long! you didn't even fucking notice,"

it took a few seconds, but as you registered her words, you sighed.

"if this is what you call love, I want no part in it,"

then you left. just as quickly as you came, you were gone. you had slipped through her fingers, and as soon as her door shut, she was left in the silence of her thoughts.

no. this can't be happening.

as she cried, she suddenly had a realization. something she had never thought of doing before, but now considered it the only choice available.

she reached into her robe's pocket, pulling out her cell phone and dialing a number.

"yes, the person leaving. bring them back up here. knock them unconscious if you have to, I... I don't mind. just... just be gentle, please,"

she ended the call with a somber face. she wiped her tears, fixing her appearance. it wasn't over, she told herself.

she had enough power in the world to do anything. so why the hell was she spending it all on you?

it must be love, she thought. stupid love that she wishes she wasn't in.

that was a lie, however.

she would do anything for you. and if she did have a choice, she wouldn't hesitate to choose the euphoria she feels whenever you smile.